Exhausted, But Feeling Great

Mya & Chaos

Just thought I'd give an update of how my brain is recovering.

I'm working more now. Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays for four hours in the morning, and Wednesdays for three hours. Physiotherapy twice a week in the afternoon. Nap for two or three hours in the afternoons as well.  Yes, I'm told naps are completely normal for the brain injured.
I seem to be doing well at work. I'm taking calls without someone sitting next to me, and handling pretty complicated inquiries and problems that come up. So that's cool!

I've moved into my sister's house. She moved in with her boyfriend.
Mallory would face financial penalties if she sold her house before June 2015. My vegan friend, Abigail, and I are renting it. I had only met her and her twin vegan sister, Joanna, at a vegan dinner event in February 2012.
We're in the perfect neighbourhood. We're about a 22-minute walk to downtown (where my work is), we're an 8-minute walk to a  flexatarian restaurant, 13th Ave Coffeehouse (they have a pile of vegan options-well, for Regina), a 6-minute walk to Dessart, a candy store that serves vegan ice cream, and a 3-minute walk to dog-walking paths by a creek.
I'll post more about living with another vegan in the future (it's pretty great). I painted a sign for our vegan kitchen.

Chaos is happy with his new family. Abigail has a Standard Poodle named Hermione Granger, often referred to as Mya. She also recently adopted Dobby, "the house elf" (she's a Harry Potter fan, if you hadn't guessed that), a Chinese Crested from the Regina Humane Society. He seriously reminds us of a house elf. He's so freaking sweet and Chaos and Mya seem to really dig him as well.
Mannie is getting braver and getting used to the dogs. It'll take more time for her to warm up to them

Defeating My Driving Anxiety

As mentioned in a past post, I completed the Driver Assessment at Wascana Rehabilitation Centre in May 2012.
After the occupational therapists and driving instructor spent an entire day assessing my abilities, they concluded that I would benefit from 4 hours of driving instruction, that I would do fine if I drove for no more than an hour at a time (I become noticeably fatigued, and make silly decisions), a GPS, and an on-road driving test to renew my license.
The driving instruction would build my confidence (it had been more than two and a half years since I drove, plus that whole 'almost-dying thing'), and the GPS would help me find my way (my internal road-mapping was off).
In August 2012, I began my four hours (an hour at a time) of instruction. I learned to correct old, bad habits that I had developed after driving for ten years. It was good. And terrifying.
For my second hour, I had worked myself up so much that I had to cancel. I was having panic attacks just thinking about driving. Not cool.
After I cancelled that lesson, my good friend volunteered to talk on the phone with me prior to each lesson. It helped distract me from the building anxiety.
I practiced with my Dad after the lessons were complete. Like old times.
I did pretty well parallel parking while with the driving instructor, but I could not parallel park with my Dad. It was ridiculous, and very frustrating.

Alas, the test date had come: September 18, 2012. 9am.
The tester was a friendly, and patient woman (can't recall her name). The first thing she had me do was parallel park. Goody
It was a beautiful parallel park. I would've had that parallel parks' babies.
We did some downtown driving on the one-ways. She noticed the vegan buttons I have on my purse. She asked if I was vegan, I happily replied, "Indeed, I am". We talked almost the entire time about veganism. It was really rad. I felt remarkably relaxed.
When the test was about three quarters of the way complete, I shared with her that I had to do this assessment as a result of my severe brain injury.
She was amazed. She never would have guessed that I had a brain injury. I thanked her, and we talked about my brain injury and the experience of my driving anxiety. By this point, we were a block away from the building, and she revealed that she hadn't taken any points. I had passed. With a 100%!!!
I was...astounded! No points deducted?! I did everything correctly?!?!
I asked if it would be inappropriate to hug her, and she replied, "not at all". I was so happy and amazed.
I'm still so happy and amazed.
I had already resigned to the fact that I would probably need to take the test a second time.

I think I want to frame the assessment paper. There are no marks on it. Incredible.

Clarifying

I thought I should clarify a few details.

Troy told me February 13th, 2012, and I quote, "I'll always have feelings for you."
(I wrote it in my iPhone)
                                                 Ouch
Once he finished that sentence, I knew it was over. (I didn't want to believe myself at the time)

On Wednesday, February 15th, we went to counseling together, he told me later that evening that we were done. I moved out, and into my parents house that weekend.
We went to counseling a couple times, but he had already tapped out. I told him that I would wait for him to work on whatever he needed to work on.
I stopped waiting in May 2012. I lied. I'm not waiting anymore.
I've gone back to using my maiden name.

Turns out, in our society, women only 'borrow' their husband's surname.
Legally, my surname was always Millham. It was just a matter of updating with the various entities to get new ID.
                                <exasperated sigh>

I made a list of what I need to change:      **everything in green I've updated**
>Facebook
>Twitter
>My Blog
>Driver's ID/license
>Banking Account
>Visa
>Provincial Health Card
>Veterinary Clinic
>Dental Office
>Visioncare Office
>Doctor's Office
>passport>Amazon.ca
>Skype account
>iTunes
>Paypal
>Sasktel(cell phone)
>Lunapads
>Library card

Working on it.
I'm NEVER changing my surname again. 
I usually say "Never say never", but if I'm with anyone that insists that I change my last name again...that's a deal breaker. It's entirely too much of a pain-in-the-ass.
*Next time* If it's that important to them, they're also changing their surname. We'll either hyphenate, or combine, or make up an entirely new name, but I refuse to be the only one to change.

Too Pooped To Blog...

As mentioned in a previous blog post, I began my graduated return to work at Great-West Life. It's been going well. I'm able to remember some things, so that's amazing.

The problem I keep running into is my fatigue level.
I started working for 2 hours on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, but had to stay at that level longer than was anticipated. I would work (or rather: have training) for the two hours, get home on the bus, and sleep for 3 or 4 hours.

It was tough to fit in my other responsibilities. Namely housework, and other errands such as counselling and lawyer meetings (separating from Troy).
For housework, I try to help my parents since I am living with them again till I can find a new home. My Mom is also rather allergic to dogs and quite allergic to cats, so I'm always vacuuming or dusting.
My parents are not vegan, and I do much of my own cooking, meal planning and grocery shopping. Although, they are eating more whole foods, so that makes me happy.

Back to work!
I'm now working three hours. I think I'll try to keep it at that level for a couple more weeks before increasing it again.
I need to take four hours of driving lessons before I can take the road test. I'd like to get that taken care of, before I'm working more.

My intention was to blog more regularly again, but it does get tricky with my return to work (we're always pushing my fatigue-level), lawyer and mediation visits, counselling, driving lessons, and regular life stuff.
Life does get overwhelming.