Working & My Ongoing Recovery

I had a couple meetings with my work supervisor, the call centre manager, Human Resources and my Acquired Brain Injury rep, Dixon, to talk about how I'm doing.
I'm currently at half-time hours. Four hours in the morning.
Then I walk home, eat something, and crash out for three, to three and a half hours.

Kind of crazy.

The next question almost always, and understandably, to be asked is, "and how are you sleeping at night?"

Answer: Fine.
I'm in bed usually by 9:30 or 10, and I sleep through the night till my alarm wakes me in the morning.

I get about twelve hours a day. That's a lot of my day spent giving my brain the rest it needs. Not a heck of a lot of time for socializing.
During the week, I work for 4 hours in the mornings (which sounds sweet, right?), go home, have lunch, sleep for another 3 and a half hours, wake up, (sometimes walk to the YMCA for a spin class), eat supper, walk Chaos (sometimes with my boyfriend-I'll get into that someday, maybe...), watch an episode of The Golden Girls, then back to bed for work in the morning.
Weekends aren't much different. Instead of working in the mornings, I get groceries, be domestic (laundry, dusting, vacuuming, etc), and go to the YMCA.

I used to be very social. I had loads of friends that I regularly spent time with.
I can get pretty bummed out about this part of my injury. Humans are very social animals. I do suffer from brief bouts of depression. Which I'm told is super common for the brain injured.

Yup. Fatigue, anxiety, note-dependency, and depression. 

I know you're jealous of ALL my time off.
(sarcasm runs deep)

Which sometimes makes me wish it was more visible. You wouldn't know just by looking at me that I had a severe brain injury. I can do a lot.
Dixon tells me that only 20% of people with a severe brain injury return to working. I may never get back to working full time. Super bummer.

But hey...I'm working...am I right??

My graduated return to Great West Life

I began my return to Great-West Life two weeks ago.
It's going surprisingly well.

Fatigue is a problem (this is extremely common for people recovering from brain injuries). I've been retraining for the group health and dental insurance call centre. That was my full time job at the time of the collision, and SGI has to try to return me to what I was doing at that time.
Originally, I handled health, drugs, dental and health care spending account inquiries.
We're starting with dental.

It seriously wrinkles my brain that I can somehow remember all of these dental service codes! I mean, not all of them, but, an incredible amount. There are women that go on maternity leave for a year and don't remember this stuff, but for some reason, me, with a severe brain injury who hasn't been at work for more than two and a half years, remembers.

How the . . . hell . . . ?
Why do I remember that 01202 is a recall exam?! And 11114 is four units (15 minutes)of scaling?!
I haven't thought about those dental procedure codes for a long time. Seriously. WTF.

Back to fatigue!
Right now, I'm working two hours in the mornings on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. I was supposed to move to four hours next week, but just the two hours knocks me out for the rest of the day.
Wow! Long naps!!
So, we're sticking to two hours for the next couple of weeks.

Great-West Life has been very gracious in my return. My Acquired Brain Injury rep, Dixon, says that they've been the most accommodating of all the companies he's worked with in returning the brain injured.
They have been stellar.

SARBI

Saskatchewan Association for the Rehabilitation of the Brain Injured.
Yeah, try to remember that with a severe brain injury!

My first painting after the brain injury

All joking aside though, it did take many months to learn SARBI's full name.
How I got involved with them was through a painting class I was taking at the Neil Balkwill Centre in the summer of 2010. Well, that and my brain injury. No need to be cheeky.
I found out about the painting class from Richelle, my ABI rep at the time. The class had other brain injured folk, usually with their ABI rep, depending on the effects of their brain injury. Turned out that I knew one of the reps! After he told me how we knew one another, because I had no memory of him. I actually asked if I might have met him at the hospital or in rehab. He reminded me that he dated a friend of mine for a long time, and we sort of worked together. Well, damn it. He was so unfamiliar to me! Turns out, he's a recreational therapist, and he works with the Acquired Brain Injury Outreach Team and at SARBI. Oh, teeny tiny Regina!
SARBI hosts art time at their office for the brain injured. Basically, they provide time, space, art materials, and support on Thursday afternoons. Because of my visual art education degree, I was encouraged to come spend Thursday afternoons helping with whatever they want to do. I did.

Van Gogh inspired

I provided instruction for whomever was having a hard time with whatever piece they were working on.
It was nice to have people that can relate. Everyone is very nice and the brain injuries vary greatly from person to person. Brain injuries from vehicle collisions, horseback riding, tumors, strokes, meningitis, even a tooth abscess! I know, right?!? I had no idea that was even possible!
From now on, I am going to the dentist whenever anything is wrong with my mouth!
And I will refuse to leave till they fix it!!


Everyone's abilities also differ greatly. Some in wheelchairs, or walkers, some need hearing devices, some need word charts. I find it so inspiring that these people are still trying. Despite whatever handicap afflicts them. Amazing!

ZuZu

I brought vegan baking every couple of weeks, along with the recipe, for everyone to share. It's nice to show people that vegan baking is delicious! That's my way of being an activist. By making delicious vegan baking and sharing the recipe.
I also paint non-human animals, whenever I get a chance to paint while I'm there.

I stopped going to SARBI in October 2011. I had gotten a new job, working as a baker at a local shop. I worked 2-3 hour shifts, and they closed permanently over the Thanksgiving weekend (remember Canada celebrates the harvest earlier than the States).
<wah wah> 

So it's back to the drawing board.
I haven't gone back to SARBI because I'm trying to figure out what to do with my life. I thought I had this figured out before!
We will see what I can do.

Journal Entries After

In January 2010, while at the Wascana Rehabilitation Cenre, I was encouraged by one of my occupational therapists to keep a journal. My printing had improved a great deal! I was no longer writing each letter on top of the last one, which, I hear was a problem. I have some of the papers I wrote on at that time-it's rather funny!
But reading through my old entries, I can see my brain healing. At first it was very, this happened, then that happened. It was very...almost clinical. I would describe events as good, or went well. I couldn't even articulate that I was seeing double till that first week of January. Maybe I wasn't seeing double before then, I don't know, can't recall.
My printing was also improving, but I can really see when I was tired! The print is much worse on those days!
This is the way I wrote it, so if the English and grammar are off, it's because I have a severe brain injury.
My first entry:

Monday January 11, 2010
I had occupational therapy @ 9:45am. Went with Troy & my mom. I finished the test. It doesn't surprise me that I remember visual things. I'm a very visual person. 
I did more stuff on the light thing, so that was good. We did more complicated with double digit numbers. It was hard because my vision won't always let me see the lights, so I was looking for them & missed the numbers.
I also read which was also challenging, in that I got a slightly different meaning from the paragraph.
Then Troy and I had a nap. Well, I closed my eyes. It's too loud at the hospital to sleep. Then we went to the cafeteria and had poutine & pudding for lunch.
After lunch was the meeting @1pm. Troy, my parents & Troy's dad was there. That went well. After the meeting we met with Richelle from ABI. That was good. Talked a little bit about Troy's brain injury.
Then we had a short nap(eyes closed), then exercise therapy@2:30. We sat there for 15 minutes & finally asked about Betty. She wasn't in. Doesn't seem to be good communication between the therapists & the ward. A bit of a gongshow. But we got a therapist. I taught her how to shimmy.
Then we went and got our new glasses. Mine are real clear but man I see double now!
We went home, let our dogs out, cleaned the kitchen, took out the garbage &the paper recycling, & went to my parents for supper, & visited with my grandparents that just happened to visit my parents as well. My grandpa is having a lot of health problems, so he had something to complain about! This time. He's a bit of a pessemist. 
Then went home, fed the cat, & let the dogs out again. Then homework, & tv. And bed.

The test I finished, was one of the many different assessments for my progress. I was tested every week. For something. Sometimes it was balance, sometimes it was comprehension, sometimes it was following instructions, sometimes it was problem solving. Different every week.

Wow, I was messed up!

"The light thing" is called a Dynavision. It is for facilitating training of looking and scanning throughout the whole visual field. (I had emailed Dixon, and he told me! See, he's got my back! I wanted to call it a 'draise machine', but that's not right!!) I was having an especially hard time with this because of my double vision. My therapists say I did well, despite the dual vision.

It's interesting that I couldn't sleep while at Wascana Rehab. I was too distracted by all the monitors and beeps and the intercom, to sleep. It's interesting, because before the brain injury, I could sleep through anything! Seriously. Back when Troy and I were just dating, him and 6 of his friends decided to play Halo. It got quite animated and loud, but I still fell asleep on the coach behind them. I guess my brain had a hard time blocking out those sounds now.
Poutine and pudding for lunch? Yup, definitely not vegan yet. I had animal pieces and/or their secretions at every meal. Every meal! And I went vegan!

At first I saw Richelle Love from the Acquired Brain Injury Outreach Team. She was filling in  for Dixon, and Dixon was filling in for someone on maternity leave at the General Hospital. Richelle was my rep for the first year of my recovery. Then Dixon returned, and she went back to being an Occupational Therapist in the Adult Rehabilitative Program at Wascana. So, either way, I would've seen her! She was is very nice, and friendly, and helpful!
Troy also had a brain injury in the collision. His is considered minor because he has no recollection of losing consciousness. Apparently, the severity is based on how long you're unconscious. Just learned that!
My grandpa had colon cancer. He doesn't anymore, now. He lived, just no more cancer! Back when I wrote that entry, he did. I just wasn't putting it all together!
My grandpa is absolutely a pessimist! My sister, Mallory, and I always say, "There could be not-a-cloud-in-the-sky, but he'll still say 'it's gonna rain and the crops don't need it!'" That's my grandpa. I love him! He's taught me how not to be! I try to stay positive through everything. I'm a lot like my mom(his daughter) that way.
My 'homework' was to play solitaire for cognitive therapy, or to practice drawing-again. <sigh> How much did I spend on a Visual Arts degree?? Sheesh!

Acquired Brain Injury Outreach Team ABI

I get brain support from a medical professional. His name is Dixon and he's an occupational therapist. He works for the Acquired Brain Injury Outreach Team. He's one of many different medical professionals that give support to people with acquired/traumatic brain injuries.
I know he's got my back! If anything comes up, or if I'm having trouble with anything, I call or email him, and he helps however he can, or gets me in touch with people that can help.
He also reports back to SGI(Saskatchewan Government Insurance-vehicle insurance) on my progress. SGI is currently replacing my wage, since I am, by definition, now disabled. (sounds like I should just be drooling)
They're also paying a small amount for my 'care'. They paid more when I couldn't walk, or shower, or go to the bathroom, or eat without help. Now, it's just the driving that I cannot do.
I will say: I am super happy I don't remember any of that!! How mortifying! 

Sorry-got distracted!
I used to work on the driving simulator with Dixon at Wascana Rehabilitation Centre. It was pretty cool. The other drivers on the simulator are pretty realistic. They cut you off all the damn time! It gets really frustrating.
I did see my rep every two weeks. Then it was every month, and most recently, every two months! Dixon was complaining that he has very little work to do with me. I'm pretty independent and I am fairly able.
Now, I'm not sure what ABI's official stance is on veganism. But Dixon is a vegetarian!
I've seen numerous doctors(& nurses & dietitians), and they are all well-aware that I am vegan. (I am plenty-proud of my veganism, and I tell everyone!)
Plus, I like to think that Dixon is pretty convinced that my brain function is stellar, considering! And I like to say it's because I'm vegan! Whether Dixon truly believes that . . . is something else. I'll ask him.